28 Day Self Love Experiment
Happy February! Since this month is all about love, I thought it was a perfect time to create a Self Love Experiment.
This month puts a huge focus on relationships or lack of one. I don’t care if you have a significant other-I mean I do care-but this is all about showering yourself with love and attention. Treating yourself to rosé and chocolate is nice (yum, really nice) but self love encompasses so much more. These 28 days of inspirational activities will help you start building your inner foundation of self love and acceptance. It’s incredibly important since how you feel about yourself impacts EVERY aspect of your life from relationships, career, your outlook on life, your choices on what you eat to how you cope with problems.
Here is the first week of self love challenges with some further elaborations. Please message me if you have questions or want to let me know how it goes! xo
Day 1- Set an Intention for the Week.
I will speak kindly to myself.
We often are the first to harshly critique ourselves, whether it’s our appearance, dropping the ball at work, not being productive enough at home and the list goes on and on. You might even motivate yourself through negative reinforcement. Maybe you feel it’s really effective to beat yourself up verbally when you miss an early morning spin class because you overslept. Let’s just try approaching it differently and see what happens, this is an experiment afterall. So, when you catch yourself engaging in negative self talk, take a deep breath and tell the critic to pipe down. Instead, ask yourself, How can I reframe this and see it through an objective lense? Would anyone who cares about me ever say these negative things about me? What might I tell a friend in this situation? Can I learn from this and move on? Is this type of self-talk serving me?
Day 2- Silence Your Inner Mean Girl
I’ll bet you could rattle off a whole list of things if I asked what you’d like to change about yourself or work on. How often do you give yourself credit and celebrate your accomplishments? Write down a list of all the wonderful traits-physical, emotional, mental, social-that make you pretty damn amazing. Then write down some accomplishments you’re proud of. Post this somewhere you can see it daily. It’s not being vain or conceited, it’s being confident.
Day 3- Journal
Let’s bring the issues to the surface. Not always fun, but being real with yourself is the first step toward making change. What are you unsatisfied with in your life? With yourself? Free write, vent, let it alllll out. Then, ask yourself this hard question. How is this challenging you to grow? What is it teaching you?
Day 4- Self Compassion
We’re usually very compassionate when a friend or family member comes to us upset with a problem. We give them support and guidance. So, what about ourselves?? Check in with yourself. How are you? What do you need? How can you provide yourself with comfort and kindness?
Day 5- Meditate
The guided meditation I chose can be found on the Insight Timer app. I suggested it because it focuses on self love, but feel free to choose any meditation you like!
Day 6- Follow Your Passions
What are you passionate about? Writing, DIY, cooking, playing sports, volunteering, starting a side hustle? Whatever it is, dedicate some time towards this passion. Get into your flow.
If this question stresses you out because you’re not sure what you’re passionate about, ask yourself these questions…
What did I love doing as a child?
How do I like to express myself-through writing. music, art, speaking, building?
What am I doing when hours can pass so quickly? What feels effortless?
Do I prefer to be active or to be creative?
Still not sure? Just try something that sounds fun, maybe a new hobby and just go for it.
Day 7- Self Care
This is a fun day to decompress and take care of you. You deserve it. ♥
This week is all about putting your needs and well being first. Does this make you selfish? Absolutely not. There is nothing selfish about setting healthy boundaries. When you subscribe to self love, you value your self worth and have set standards for how you should be treated. This allows for healthy relationships from your love life to your family to your colleagues. AKA You won’t take any BS from anyone. You honor them and that should be reciprocated. What if you’re the one that is abusing your body and mind with toxic habits or thoughts? This week is for you, too.
So, what makes it so damn hard to release things (or people) that are toxic in our lives?! They may be ingrained beliefs that we’ve held on to for years. We may feel obligated to the person because they’re family or a friend or a partner. We don’t like conflict. They have been in our lives for so long, it’s impossible to see life without them. One way to deal is to set clear and firm boundaries. This might require saying no sometimes or being more protective of your time, energy and space.
Day 1-Set an intention to let go of things that no longer serve you. Reflect on why this is for your greater good.
Day 2-Reflect and journal on the quote in the calendar. We often carry baggage around with us that weighs on our minds, bodies and hearts. Have you reached your breaking point with someone in your life? A needy friend, co-worker or family member? A toxic relationship? You’ll know by paying attention to how you feel when they are around or after an encounter with them. Do you leave them feeling nourished or drained? Are you giving all of your energy and not gaining anything in return.
Are you the one spreading toxic thoughts or behaviors? Emotional eating, negative self talk, ingrained beliefs are examples. I was recently working with a client who said she just realized that her assumption all these years that she was “lazy and unambitious” was actually completely wrong. She in reality was a perfectionist who never thought she measured up to her own impossibly high standards. What have you been telling yourself that’s not even close to being true.
Day 3-Personal boundaries are the limits and rules we set for ourselves within relationships. A person with healthy boundaries can say no to others when they want to, but they are also comfortable opening themselves up to intimacy and close relationships. A person who always keeps others at a distance has rigid boundaries. Alternatively, someone who tends to get too involved with others has porous boundaries. Physical, emotional, intellectual, sexual, time, and material boundaries can be set. What limits do you need to set to respect yourself?
The rest of the week is similar to week 1. I want you to build some consistent habits when it comes to meditation, devoting time to your passions, self care and checking in with yourself.