GuyTypes: 4 Ways To Find the Love Of Your Life
Between blind dates, online dating and trying to find “the one,” the whole process can feel so stressful. Have you ever met someone who seemed like your perfect dreamy match, but then they quickly showed their true colors and became more of a nightmare? You may have wanted to give up on dating altogether or wondered if all the good ones were taken. I’ll be honest and say I was a hot mess when I was dating and had no clue what I was doing. I share some of my story here. So, if you’re my dating twin, read on..
Don’t give up, yet! There is a solution to the love equation secret and Dr Alex Avila, the author of GuyTypes wants to let you in on it. He believes that if you have not been successful in the dating world, it might be because you are not looking for the “right kind of person.” You may be attracting people into your life who are not compatible with you. Ever feel like you keep dating the same kind of guy over and over? Perhaps, the unavailable bachelor for life has been on your dating rotation for years now. This book shares a simple, yet scientific approach to finding your long lasting love match.
First, you have to discover your love temperament, which is like your love personality. There are 4 love temperaments-
Once you have this information, you can figure out which Guytype you’re most compatible with. The author even shares where to meet guys like this, how to communicate with them through texts, snaps and messages and most importantly, how to foster a relationship with them.
So, when you’re at a coffee shop and strike up a convo with the cute guy working on his laptop next to you, how do you know which love type he is? Don’t worry, Dr Avila has got you covered. He tells you everything you need to know, even down to what kind of husband your crush would be!
Q&A with the Author
Dr. Alex Avila is an award-winning clinical and forensic psychologist who holds four graduate degrees, including a Ph.D. in clinical psychology. A respected college professor, researcher, and bestselling author (The Gift of Shyness, GuyTypes and The 3 Secrets of Happiness), Dr. Avila’s first book, LoveTypes, has been an international bestseller.
So, does this mean that you and your love have to be exactly the same type of person?
No, you don’t have to be exactly the same. You can have surface differences; he can like bowling, and you can like opera. But, at the very core of your personalities, you share a like-mindedness in your values, life perspective, goals, and desires in life. That is called being compatible, and is the best research-proven way to build a happy and successful long-term relationship.
I always believed that opposites attracted and balanced each other out. What are your thoughts?
Yes, but similar core values make relationships last. Actually, research shows that similar personalities tend to attract, and work out better, in the long run. Opposite personalities in relationships usually succeed in one scenario—in the movies (especially rom coms).
What if I’ve met a guy I’m crazy about, but we’re not the same lovetype?
The key is to know what to expect when you date outside your recommended GuyType pairing-when you date someone who is different, or even opposite from you (ex. An excitement seeker with a security seeker). When you date someone who is quite different from you in key personality areas, you will probably have to work harder to accentuate the strength of the pairing, while minimizing any weaknesses.
Overall, I found this to be an interesting read that is packed full of useful information to help you break dating patterns that may be inhibiting you. Even if you’re not sure you want to date someone whose personality is so similar to yours, at least you’ll be a little more prepared and self aware the next time you find yourself in a hot exchange with Mr Right/Right Now? xo