Q: UGH! I will never understand men…or should I say boys. I’ve tried every approach when it comes to texting. I’ve been responsive, I’ve been aloof, I’ve been flirty, I’ve been funny. If we make it to the first date, (and even if I think it went well) for whatever reason, we never make it past that! And most guys just text me and we never end up hanging out. WTH am I doing wrong? I’m about to swear dating off completely.
A: I feel your pain, as do women everywhere. Texting has gotten out of control in the dating world and has become a bit of a game. So, I guess you just gotta learn to play by your own rules. First of all, why not take a little break from dating since you seem totally frustrated. Spend some time on you. Focus on a new hobby or spend some QT time with friends and family. I would also strongly suggest taking up yoga and/or meditation. This will get in a better frame of mind that focuses on the present, rather than dwelling on the past or ruminating over the future. Dating can be stressful, so why not be on top of your emotional game?
After your break, start fresh with a whole new dating perspective. Try your best to be positive and have some faith you’re gonna meet a quality guy, when the timing is right. Rather than trying to play a role of the funny girl or the flirty girl, just be yourself! I have a friend who was really sick of the small talk over text. She kept the texts to a minimum so that the main conversations could happen in person on a date. This will be a great way to weed out the guys who aren’t serious and just looking for a texting buddy. I can’t say why you’re not making it past the first date, but try to self reflect and be completely honest with yourself. Could it be the fact that you’re not being your authentic self, but trying to play a role? Since you have no control over the guys’ feelings or actions, all you can do is show up, be the best version of yourself, have some laughs and enjoy the process.