Q: I dated a guy for three years and we lived together for half that time. Such a genuine person who always supported me. He was always willing to help me with whatever I needed from taking care of my cats, to cooking for me, to cheering me up when I had a bad day. And on top of all that-he could make me laugh like no other. But I took him for granted. I pulled away and became distant because I grew bored and I mistakenly thought it wasn’t “exciting” enough. I eventually cheated on him. I have been going to a therapist and I now know that it has a lot to do with my family issues growing up and never really understandning what a healhty relationship looks like. I’ve been working on myself and have made a lot of progress. Now, I feel like I made the biggest mistake of my life and I want him back. I realize that what we had was real love. I’ve tried reaching out to him about giving me another chance and he won’t even respond. I get it-I broke his heart and probably don’t deserve another chance. I just know I’ll never have it that good again and I can’t stop crying. I don’t know how to move on. Any advice is appreciated.
A: It sounds like your ex was the major life lesson you needed to propel you forward. You’re going to counseling, you’re working on your personal issues stemming from childhood so that you can have a better future. I say, bravo! Be proud of yourself that you’re so self aware and motivated to change. Keep working on you and only good things will come. And who knows, maybe you and your ex will find each other again. Orrr maybe you’ll find someone else equally amazing. As hard as it is, trust the timing of your life.